Good morning, everyone and welcome to the Bed Head Chronicles.
Today, I want to talk about those things in your life that you may think are constant thorns in your side. Whether it be a situation or relationship or whatever it is. But it’s something that causes you constant suffering.
I know we all have those things at different points in our lives. But what I want to talk about this morning is that these things that stick around, these thorns in our side — we get what we tolerate. For as long as we’re willing to accept the situation or behavior, it’s going to stick around. It’s not going to magically go away.
We all have to find the strength, find the reason why we must change the way things are.
Life is meant to live and meant to be something that gives us great joy. And it can. But it depends on what we’re focusing on. Are we focusing on what’s missing, or what we have? Are we focusing on what is good, or what is wrong? Are we focusing on what we want, or what we don’t want to happen? Are we focusing on what we have control over, or what we don’t have control over?
The direction of our focus is directly related to our experience of life.
I know in my sad and really tough times, I was focusing on what was missing, what I didn’t have, what I had no control over and what I feared and didn’t want to happen. It was no wonder why I was miserable. But when I changed what I was focusing on all the right things — abundance, love, what I wanted to create and what I did have control over — my experience of life changed everything for me.
I’m a true believer that we can be happy no matter what’s going on in our lives. We can be at peace and be happy if we choose to focus on what’s good every moment. But with that being said, even if you do that most of the time in your life — if there’s something that you can see causes you pain or suffering or seems to be a problem that you’ve had forever, then look at the problem. Why is it still there? Why hasn’t it changed?
Now, if it’s another person that we’re waiting for them to change, that’s never going to happen. And we can’t change them. But what you can do is change your reaction. Change the way you see their behavior. Change the way you have it affect you. Because what we tolerate is what we get.
If there’s a certain behavior at work or the way we’re being treated by our bosses, and we stay and still work there without changing anything, that’s going to stick around because you’re not doing anything to change it.
Now, a few things can happen. You can change the way you’re looking at the behavior of your boss, and somehow, find a way to have it positively influence you, rather than negatively. Or, you can get a new job and find something that is better suited for you. But we get what we tolerate in life.
If you are unhappy in any area of your life, you are in control. You have the power to change it. Whether that be by acting or breaking a certain power and deciding to never go back. Or reframing the situation or circumstance in a way that will serve you rather than disserve you.
But whatever it is, anything that we believe is a thorn in our side, we have the ability to pull it out. Change is often really hard. Sometimes we give in to certain behaviors because we feel powerless to change them. But I’m telling you right now that we all have the power within us to change any situation. Whether it be by what we choose to focus on or the meaning that we give it or what we choose to do about it.
So, take action today. Decide not to suffer anymore. Give yourself permission to find joy and peace in every aspect of your life. You can. It’s in your control. Just practice the discipline to find a way out of the suffering and into the joy.
Thank you, everyone. Have an amazing day and thank you for listening to the Bed Head Chronicles.
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